Songster​-​14 Early Songs

by Indio Saravanja

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about

January 23, 2010

Here's what I thought would be a good idea when I woke up a few days ago:
Put out a record of some of my 'best' first songs.
Pick songs that paint a picture of the younger music man I was and what was concerning me then
(a lot of the same stuff as now).
Record it solo with one guitar and harmonica in one night's session (naked and all).
Call it Songster (not Singer-Songwriter) -cause that's what I've mostly been for a long time now.
That was the idea.

These songs were written in the period between my late teens and mid twenties- a very exciting time during which many were completed and many more abandoned. They came to life on napkins, in journals, and the backs of bus and plane tickets on the land and sky roads between my main hangouts of that time: Yellowknife, New York, Madrid, Montreal, Toronto, Mexico, Argentina, and the West Coast. I was passionate and crazy, obsessed with getting better, and writing as much as I could. A ditch digging, dishwashing, boat painting, man for hire by day and bohemian human jukebox busker and lounge lizard by night, I was shyly writing these songs on the side wondering if they'd ever be good enough to share with you. I still haven't answered that question, but it's time to let them go. A couple of them still get sung on tours from time to time and one or two have been reworked too many times to count. Here are the first shots that ever came from my Smith and Wesson.

Indio

p.s. thanks to all the songster heros who ever let me wear them on my sleeve. Like my old friend J.B. once rightly told me: they'll lead you to yourself eventually.

"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." -Anais Nin

-for Violeta

credits

released March 12, 2010

All songs by Indio Saravanja except Nobody Waits For Me with Victor Alejandro Wainer
Recorded January 26th 2010 at Woodshop Studios, Duncan BC
Mixed and mastered by Zak Cohen copyright 2010

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about

Indio Saravanja Toronto, Ontario

Argentine born, Arctic Canada raised, Indio Saravanja is a poetic songwriter, talented multi-instrumentalist, and adventurous composer, whose poignant, honest words cut to the bone. A dynamic performer who charms the crowd with his candid and often humorous tales, he is an also an exciting musician - solo or with a band, acoustic or electric. ... more

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Track Name: Castles
Castles

Today it is a fine day in the sun
follow me my child
and give thanks to the one
for this goodness that has come
let the work be done

until today the cold has ceased to yield
makes it kinda tough
when you're working in the fields
and the grounds too cold to kneel
blisters peel

do you know just how it feels

and i pray that in a while we get some rain
gently fall from heaven
pour it's love into the grain
and put me on my feet again
i'll go insane

cause those city boys are back again to steal
the only thing I've ever had
my kids need their meals
and they come here with their deals
dirty deals

do you know just how it feels

and little johnny said to me today
daddy are they really
going to take it all away
why can't they let us stay
what could i say?

your politicians never find the time
to listen to my troubles
they just say I'm out of line
and I'm falling far behind
I'm in a bind

do you know just how it feels

(when the dogs are at your heels
when the world's at their command
it's all just castles in the sand)
Track Name: Leaving Here
Leaving Here

Saw a picture yesterday
man it took my breath away
you and me on the airport road
on silver wheels in a sky of gold
silver wheels and a sky of gold
in a town that left us so cold
I remember every word so clear
told each other we were leaving here

I still see them hilltop shacks
summer winds and factory stacks
man they made an awful stink
we played guitars and we learned to drink
we played guitars and we learned to drink
kissed the girls at the skating rink
I remember how I held her near
how I told her I was leaving here

We were looking for that one way out
all our heroes sang about
like a promise on the radio
with the music saying go go go
driving steady round the edge of town
going up and coming back down
always wishing we could disappear
everybody dreamed of leaving here

Now you've got a pretty wife
a nice big house and a steady life
you still dream of being a star
I make my living on this old guitar
I make my living on this old guitar
I got away but I never got far
it's nice to see you after all these years
come tomorrow I'll be leaving here
Track Name: Nothing Town
Nothing Town

Nobody turns around
or lifts their eyes off the ground
in Nothing Town
in Nothing Town

Nobody talks to you
you wish you were just passing through
this Nothing Town
has brought you down

Pieces
Pieces of someone you've been
someone that no one has seen
for a long long time
Places
places that you'd like to go
and the people all smile like they know
that you don't have a dime (to show)

Nobody here seems to care
when I wave my thumb in the air
close my eyes and pray
for a getaway

And I've been here way too long
some kind of feeling is gone
and I can only say
I need a getaway

Dreaming
baby was it only a dream
I was pulling away breaking clean
yeah I was shifting down
Leaving
baby I swear I was leaving
and it was so hard to believe
when I woke up again

In Nothing Town
Oh no....
Track Name: Nobody Waits For Me
Nobody Waits For Me

The road is endless sometimes it's senseless
when nobody calls my name
winters and summers cities and meadows
looked different but felt the same
under a roof I never raised
under a cloud and a moon
under the shadow of a tree that sways
I pray that you'll come to me soon

The road is lonesome and so is the sleep
I'm lonely and black as a bird
lost and flying in the night so deep
I can't be seen or heard
flying around trying to get found
you could bring me down with a word
say it sweet and I'll fall at your feet
and things will be just as they were

I lean over books I never wrote
they tell me my love is a lie
I listen to songs and note for note
they tell me you just have to try
yesterday's broken and I wish you were joking
the last time you spoke with your eyes
I wish I could leave it's hard to believe
you ever said goodbye

Will I yearn for your sweet return
or will I learn to be free
there's nothing to prove except that I can keep moving
when nobody waits for me
open your heart and close your eyes
follow the sound of the bird that cries
wherever you are you can hear him sing
nobody waits for me

wherever you are you can hear him sing
nobody waits for me
Track Name: Home (Song for Mom)
Home


I used to take you to the carnival
when you were just a little kid
you thought that everything was wonderful
it didn't matter what we did
the sun was shining and the sky was blue
the summer air was warm and sweet
I'd pull your wagon down the avenue
and get you something nice to eat

Home is the love that's in your mother's heart
when you've got nowhere left to stand
when everything in life gets pulled apart
I want to hold you by the hand

Just like a bird that has to learn to fly
your mom will teach you to believe
your mom will teach you how to love the sky
knowing that someday you will leave
sometimes I wonder why you never call
don't you have anything to say
who's gonna hold you when you slip and fall
I think about you everyday

Home is the love that's in your mother's heart
when you've got nowhere left to stand
when everything in life gets pulled apart
I want to hold you by the hand
Track Name: Sleep Late Maria
Sleep Late Maria

The artists are restless
they need a new scene
the businessmen changed
all the locks on their dreams
the theme park is open
the soldiers are out of a war
so sleep late Maria
you don't have to fight anymore

It's cold in the East
where the dead cannot rest
the promised land's crowded
and cracked in the West
i'm stuck in the praries
as empty as i've every been
i gave you my heart
and i'm still finding out what that means

When the last show was over it felt like a sin
we're just looking for cover til the next one begins
we make enough to move on with
but it feels like we're falling apart

We're trying so hard to get on with the show
but like Gypsies we're hated wherever we go
and i know we'd surrender it all
if we knew where to start

I'm writing you now
from this little cafe
we're in town for the night
then we're back on our way
to the road that we long for
the road we were all born to roam
so sleep late Maria
i don't know when i'm coming home
Track Name: Marie
Marie

Tried to get some sleep last night then I saw the dawn
I used to be so good at this so naturally turned on
by the beauty and the mystery but now I feel I've lost my touch
I'm looking out at the sunset now and I don't feel very much
I built so many fences started to lose my nerve
you made me stick to my defenses girl and I got what I deserved
got so worn out by the worry I let you down entirely
and though you're five years gone I know I can't move on until I see your face Marie

When the birds came out this morning and they made their debut
It was like they sang for the very first time and it made me think of you
of loneliness in April stretching out into May
and how I found you on that spanish evening in that tired old cafe
how I never had much money and how you lived with that
when I was singing on the street and how you used to pass my hat
but from the day we met I never could forget about the man I had to be
you said it from the start that he would break our hearts
I guess I know that now Marie

I've got a friend with a cabin who lives on the edge of a lake
he's one of the very few I know who isn't out on the make
one day he just woke right up and he walked out on everything
he lives alone by the water now and he writes down all his dreams
he don't get many visitors and doesn't seem to mind
sometimes I get the feeling that he's left this world behind
and though my life's become a lot like his while fighting to stay free
at times my shape gets bent thinking to what extent
I let you keep me down Marie

My days are strange and meaningless and nothing makes much sense
I'd like to think that we'd be different now but I've got no evidence
the past keeps burning up my mind you know it's hard to get much sleep
can't stop thinking bout the weight of the world and all the things I couldn't keep
and when I think about you I can't be sure that it's for real
I'm not so sure that you can love anyone until you know just how you feel
and even then you can't be certain it's not just yourself that you see
both beautiful and terrible behind the curtains of Marie

there's a lot of pretty faces in a world of window panes
looking haunted and unwanted when you're walking through the rain
when their aim's as true as your loneliness they can save you from the storm
but there comes a point when you can't pretend you wouldn't rather just stay warm
than to be held up by someone's charms against the wall of alibis
like an outlaw trading false alarms for a place for clothes to dry
and the romance of a fixed address and a real identity
the day that you hand in your guns and belt you'll see just how i felt Marie
Track Name: Exit Sign
Exit Sign

You let me in
and now I'm
looking for that exit sign
I've always been that way
I don't know what I'm trying to say (but)
it's getting hard to be this existential man
I look into your eyes and I wonder how I can
how I can

You came in here
and caught me
you caught me with an open mind
a certain 'what the hell'
and baby I heard wedding bells
when love's the last thing that I ever thought I'd find
I looked at you and I found a world I left behind
left behind

So here I am
(now baby)
looking for that exit sign
but it don't make no sense
to just believe in accidents
it's getting hard to be the man who never would
I look into your eyes and I wonder how I could
how I could....
Track Name: Same Old Blues
Same Old Blues

Here's some brand new changes
for the same old chords
I've got some new arrangements
for the same old worn out words
guaranteed to be the same old thing
you always hear me do
i've got a brand new song
same old blues

I wrote it in the kitchen man
I learned it in the car
banged it out tonight for the same old people
down at the same old bar
thought i heard somebody tapping their feet
'til i looked down at my shoes
i've got a brand new song
same old blues

Now working at this table isn't always fun
especially when i tell myself that the songs have all been sung
but as long as my window keeps me looking babe
and that moon shines up in the sky
i'll keep on singing everything i know
even if you think it's just a lie

I'm a devil in my steeple
but i'm working for the Lord
i'm working for the lonely people
and i hope they don't get bored
but if you wonder who i'm singing for
ain't it time you realize it's you
i've got a brand new song
same old blues

cause the world's in confusion man
and everybody's sick
everybody wakes up in the morning
has to turn some kind of trick
but everything that I'm doing
I'm just trying to do it true
i've got a brand new song
same old blues

working at this table.... (repeat chorus)
Track Name: Stranger
Stranger

Well he came to town on a winter's day
and he brought with him the spring
in a long black coat full of songs he wrote
and a guitar on a string
and he found a spot for the voice he brought
in the village market square
and he cut the sky with a naked cry
that came from everywhere
came from everywhere

HIs music was like poetry
and the men all bowed their heads
his voice was sweet when it hit the streets
and the ladies cheeks went red
and the bluebirds sang like a drunken gang
from the roofs and the window sills
we went inside when my mother cried
as the sun rolled down the hills
sun rolled down the hills

With his eyes like night and his raven hair
he could hypnotize a crowd
i wasn't allowed but i watched him there
i felt mischievous and proud
and late at night i would wander down
and i'd find him all alone
sleeping in his raincoat
on a pillow made of stone
pillow made of stone

Well i never will forget his face
and sometimes it makes me mad
cause i never thought i'd take his place
and lose the home i had
well the years roll past and they roll so fast
i've been moving right along
so put a quarter in my case
and i'll sing you one last song
sing you one last song

The night is long when you know them songs
you don't belong no more
i have become a man that runs
like strangers of before
the night is black on the railroad track
and the darkness knows no end
the night is black on the railroad track
and i won't be back again
won't be back again
Track Name: Music Man
Music Man

Well i bring the old man's song a new direction
i'm trying to relieve him in my time
i can sing his tired songs with such conviction
i wonder why i can't believe in mine

I've been to all the places that he went to
that taught to read the faces for the lies
i've tried most every drug and every whiskey
to find a word of truth behind the eyes

I travel with a singer and a dancer
their loves' a story made to make you cry
i don't know if we'll ever find an answer
it seems we're only learning how to die
it seems we're only learning

With many miles of storm the night is falling
a smile could keep me warm when sleep is calling
it's time to count my pennies
but i'm tired and there's not many
and i can barely move my hands
but i do the best i can
i am the music man
i am the music man
i am the music man
Track Name: Desolation Angel
Desolation Angel

Well I hope that there's still room up on that wagon
where you said that you would save a place for me
with the ones who had to overcome the dragons
that were threatening to drown them in that sea
cause I don't want to be the junk left in your closet
by some cripple that you had to leave behind
a pair of sad eyes peering from your locket
of some memory that's too heavy for your mind

With a heart that had an inkling of heaven
and a body that was shackled to the earth
I've spent a lifetime cursing my conception
searching for the knowledge of its worth
but I don't want to be the wreckage on the highway
of some drunken ghost who lives inside your heart
I don't want to be the echo in night's hallways
of the sound of blood and metal torn apart

Oh let me rise
let me rise
up from this bed
made of my lies
cause I don't want to be a desolation angel

And I don't know if I'll be here in the morning
but it's funny that I'm not afraid to sleep
and because I know I've had my share of warnings
It's time to make a promise I can keep
Cause I don't want to be a letter in your mailbox
that you press against your chest on lonely nights
I don't want to make the news at 6 pm dear
or live another day without your light

Oh let me rise...
Track Name: The Last Time (I Committed Suicide)
The Last Time (I Committed Suicide)

I saw the beauty of the word
between the lines where many men had died
for a duty so absurd
for the rumor of a painted bird
the last time I committed suicide

I saw a baby in the womb
inside the stoney stare of a young girl's eyes
I saw a noose in every room
from the cradle to an old man's tomb
the last time I committed suicide

I saw the men who rule my land
who lay to waste my world with pride
with their fascist architecture and their fire
Where money is the king
and the truth ain't worth a thing
and beauty doesn't seem to be desired

I saw the men who ruled my land
it made me wonder if I killed the wrong man
the last time I committed suicide

solo

I heard the laughter round my name
I saw a Godly road on which to ride
I saw a people still in chains
I saw a beast too big to tame
the last time I committed suicide

I thought of all the love i'd had
that I could still feel deep inside
beneath a world of lies I saw a road to my revival
I saw my mother and my dad
and I remembered how they tried
how they always fought so hard for our survival

just when the line was stretched so thin
that's when you called me back again
the last time I committed suicide
Track Name: End Of Every Line
End Of Every Line

When you are surrounded by an image
when you get confounded by the noise
hypnotized by someone else's vision
paralyzed by someone else's voice
when everything around you's breaking down babe
and you can't tell the difference in your mind
between the world you find
and the one of your design
meet me at the end of every line

I know you've seen the light fade in the darkness
and all your pages raged into the night
and I can't say I know how much you've witnessed
or tell you just how long you'll have to fight
i know you've got a heart that longs for cover
and I know you've had some troubles in your time
so if you need a friend
I'll be just around the bend
out here at the end of every line

even if your heart longs for another
even if I'm with somebody else
what we had was only for each other
and what it meant well only time can tell
even if your world is full of murder
and there's a thousand soldiers in your bed
that swear to me you'll never be a mother or a lover
I'd offer you a place to rest your head

I have seen the children in the valley
dance beneath the killers in the hills
I've seen lilies in the fields of desolation
growing where the blood of hatred spills
growing though they know not why they're growing
growing where the sun don't even shine
out here where our best thoughts have been going all along
out here at the end of every line